


would have been

by DirtyBrian



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-05
Updated: 2016-09-05
Packaged: 2018-08-13 02:45:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 378
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7959268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DirtyBrian/pseuds/DirtyBrian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is a Bad Wolf Bay in this universe too. He promises himself that he’ll never go there, that he’ll never step foot in Norway.</p>
            </blockquote>





	would have been

There is a Bad Wolf Bay in this universe too. He promises himself that he’ll never go there, that he’ll never step foot in Norway. He can’t. The pain and the memories would be too much. And he doesn’t need the guilt- he feels plenty of that as it is. No, it’s better for him if he stays far, far away from that place.

Much likes many of the promises he’s made (to himself and others), this one is lost in a sea of emotion and good intentions. Barely six months go by before he’s setting down on the frozen beach. Martha is visiting her family, and he feels a wild need to be closer to Rose.

As soon as he steps outside the TARDIS, he regrets his decision. The frigid wind is whipping across the landscape, and while he doesn’t feel the chill, he can’t help but wonder if Rose had been cold when she was on this beach, in Pete’s World. That wouldn’t be right. She shouldn’t be cold, not when he wasn’t there to warm her up.

Sometimes, at night, when he’s more solitary than usual, left alone with his thoughts (always a dangerous thing), he replays that conversation in his head. How he might’ve done it differently with another chance. He would’ve said it. Would’ve worked up the courage to tell her how he feels, how his hearts beat for her alone. He would have told her that without her, his existence is lifeless. He remembers the tears on her cheeks and the way her hands clenched against the assault of emotions she was experiencing. He remembers wanting to scream and cry at the universe, to curse it for tearing them apart.

He feels similarly now, in this place that is both so close and so far from her. His jaw clenches, and he’s fighting valiantly against the tears that threaten. The small pain of his fingernails digging him into his palms is a welcome distraction from the desire to tear two universes apart to get to her.

“Rose Tyler.” His voice is instantly carried away by the wind. He lets it go, and the tear that rolls down his cheek is a harsh reminder of his impotence against the indifference of the universe.


End file.
